It is extremely noble for you to start this petition. Something must be done to help protect children. I just have a problem with your point #1. First of all, it is very vague, what do you mean that "The religious freedom of individuals is respected." This is extremely overly broad and could mean anything.
I think you are meaning that you want them to investigate Disfellowshipping and Shunning. This practice is not a good policy at all but I hate when people connect the abuse of children with that of disfellowshipping when they try to have a petition or try to communicate with governmental officials. Child abuse is breaking the law, shunning is not against the law. These need to be separate items and not try to connect the two. While yes Angus Stewart connected the emotional strain of shunning with child abuse he did not connect the whole practice of shunning with it, he narrowed it to only that of shunning those who have been victims of child abuse.